Who are you unwilling to love?
Who pulls you out of your element? Who injects poison into your life? Who abuses you? I’m asking this because when you hate them, you don’t just emotionally abuse them, you abuse yourself.
Hate doesn’t separate you from other people, it ties you to them. Every reason to hate is a condition & each condition ties a chord between you and that person. You try to move on, move forward, and get over it, but you’re dragging their dead-weight. You drag choices, attitudes and demeanors that exist in the past, and by dragging them, you pull each layer into your present. By trapping them, you trap yourself.
When hate doesn’t see the human being underneath, love sees past each layer. When hate refuses to let people change, love lets them live out a new future. When hate traps you, love sets you free, to change everything, including the way you feel about other people.
We are designed to love unconditionally.
For a long time, I thought that meant I had to love all conditions. I had to love bratty behavior, nuanced insults and destructive choices.
I don’t have to do any of that. Actually, I refuse.
So again, who are you unwilling to love? What conditions cut them off, or shall I say, tie them, to you?
List every condition you have to love.
- The conditions to give love.
- The conditions to withhold love.
- And especially, the conditions to receive love.
Challenge yourself to love, unconditionally. #lovezombies Tell me what you find. Ask your friends what they find.
Personally, I didn’t love for so long because my gut knew how hard it would be to love myself once I realized how much time & energy I wasted on hate.
Then, ask, “What is the worst that can happen if I just love?” Maybe you will feel like a pushover, like your settling, like your naive.
Or maybe, you’ll feel free.